I just need to talk. I am freshly amped with caffeine, so I think my fingers will keep up with my mind. However, this might become disjointed in spots, please forgive my rambling.
Have you ever done something and then when it's not this amazing, exciting new thing anymore you start to question the heck did I just do? Yes, me too. But, we pick up our boot straps and pull up our big girl panties and MARCH!
I love Florida. I really do. It is the antithesis of Wisconsin in almost every conceivable way. Oh wait, they do have cows...and roosters. This I know because a couple of streets over there is a cow pasture in the middle of a residential neighborhood. I'm thinking they were there first...? lol And there is a rooster a neighborhood or two over that crows every morning. When I have my windows open, I can hear him.
Moving here has been the hardest thing I have ever done. Some of this I may have whined to you already but, to top the list, the emotional aspect has been heart wrenching. I miss my parents so much some days I could just lay in bed, in a pool of my tears and snot, until I crust over. Thank God my parents learned how to text before we moved or I don't know what I would do. I hate sitting on the phone. I miss my friends. I miss my scrapbook Saturdays. I miss going to the drive-in. I miss card night at our house. I miss cooking in a kitchen that's big enough and having people over. I miss canning salsa with my best friend...... You don't realize how comfortable you are in your life until you have to start over from scratch for everything. Even down to the basic need of friendships. I don't need a lot of people close to me, but when you have no one.......it gets lonely. In the last month or two we have begun to forge friendships with people in our church. Not that we necessarily do things outside of church right now, but it's nice to know that there are people that are happy to see you. Really, the only thing hard after that would be the financial aspect. I don't think we have recovered yet. But BOY!!!! has my faith in God's ability to take care of me grown. Leaps and Bounds!! We are never without what we need.
I am greatful that God has placed me here, in this place, in this time. It would have taken me years to reach the faith level I have gotten to just by moving away from everything I've ever known.
The bible says that if you will give up mothers and fathers and sisters and brothers and properties for His sake, you will be blessed a hundredfold (Matt 19:29)....I am expecting that. We did not move only because we wanted to live somewhere warm. We moved because we felt like God placed us here for a reason. Couldn't tell you what it is right now. We see things developing and are excited about the possibilities. But, no matter what, we are in training for the next season of our lives and we are going to learn all that we need to know. One thing we are certain of is that we are to finish getting our kids through high school. We will not be released to move on until that has happened. They are loving Florida Virtual School so far. It's a great program. Teo actually likes school this year.
We have begun to have devotion time with our kids every night. I know that it is assumed that if you homeschool and you are Christians that you have devotions with your kids. I was never one of those "do it all right" kind of moms. There are lots of things I've fallen down on. Devotions was one of them. We noticed a really bad pattern of bad behavior coming out of our kids. God showed me that is because I neglected my first mission field. So, every night we have family prayer with prayer requests and issues we know of that we pray for others, as well as, ourselves. And we read a book out of Proverbs every night. I want to branch out from that and start adding a chapter from other books. The kids are disappointed if they only get to read once and there are all kinds of things to learn in the bible, so why not? I see the change in programming working. My kids are more pleasant to be around. They are becoming kinder to each other and they are getting the Word in them. Even if its in small doses, it will change their lives. I'm expecting great things.
I received an invitation from a gentleman at church to come and sing with his personal ministry group. He talked with both Tony and I about it and I am going to start going to practices on the 19th. He told Tony the first time he heard me sing, he knew instantly that I had to come sing with him and that God has given me a gift and I need to stop hiding it. Wow. That is humbling. Tony told him that I have been singing in church since I was 12 and he asked "And she's never done anything with it?" It floors me that this man, who performs for and with great talent, loves my voice. I honestly don't look at myself as stacking up to other people's talent even though I've been asked most of my life when I was going to start recording. Fear and insecurity have always held me back. But no more. I know that God has created my voice for His glory and for such a time as this. I think nothing has happened with my voice up till now because it wasn't the right timing. In my life and in my walk with God.
Ok. Time for me to end my rambling. I pray you have a blessed and prosperous day. That you have favor with everyone you come in contact with and you are able to touch someone in a positive way! Shine on, Cities on a Hill!!
- I am 44. I am married to the love of my life. Together we have two beautiful young adults who bring me joy everyday. In 2015 we added another beautiful young adult to our house, our niece, and she has been a great joy! Secretly, I'm counting the years till grandbabies start coming; they just need to find their forever loves first.